Posts Tagged ‘Kayamandi’
The problem with being comfortable is that you get lazy. You don’t change anything – you accept yourself as you are and accept your situations as well. You forget that there are other people outsite your comfort bubble.
In our cell group at church we are studying – more discussing really – the book “Starving Jesus” and last week we were talking about why as followers of Christ we don’t do those things that we’ve been saying followers of Christ should be doing and I think the majority of us came to the conclusion that we are lazy (I like the title the book gives – “born-again lazy”) and have grown comfortable and complacent. We’ve accepted that things are what they are. We want to see change but we don’t want to be the ones to bring about that change.
Stangely enough, the next day, a colleague from work posted a blog on our company blogsite about being comfortable and pretty much what we had said about being comfortable the day before but without the “Christian” context – just more in general life. But I thort that that was really cool or weird that this “comfortable-ness” seeps into so many aspects of our life. Anyway he also posted the portion of this poem by Kahlil Gibran that talks about comfort.
My favorite Ghandhi quote is “be the change you want to see in the world” and my favorite Mother Theresa quote is “there are no great things to be done in this life, just small things done with great love”. I’m trying to incoparate these things into my daily life. If I want the world to change I need to change; however, being comfortable makes that a little harder. Being comfortable makes change scary. So what’s the solution? How do I “uncomfortabilize my comfortability” (a quote from an as-yet-to-be-famous friend)?
I could quit my job – that would certaily make me uncomfortable. But is that what God wants. I could spend more time with random street people and show them love – that would also be out of my comfort zone and yes, I think God would want me to do that one. But after my stalker situation its more scary than uncomfortable. I blogged a little while back about moving to a township (on Kasi and community) – and that would be uncomfortable as well, but I’m not sure that’s where I’m being called. I don’t know though, these aren’t really small things are they? Well…actually the second one is.
Here’s the thing about me: I tend to jump on to other people’s passions or callings or whatever. This dude from church is moving to Kayamandi and so now I’m all into this moving to Kayamandi thing. I mean it would be cool in a way, and I would totally save a bundle on rent and stuff and the ministry opportunities are definitely there, but yea, that’s Brett’s thing not mine. And the whole “God of Justice” thing is Josh’s thing. I think I need to find my thing. It sucks that I don’t have a thing – well I do but I don’t know how to go about living it out. Okay, that was a little side track.
So here I stand not knowing where I fit, and yet ok with going with the flow. That’s really bad. I need to fix that.
“…I want to live out my life and ministry in community.
I want my life TO BE my ministry…Thus, now, I want to bring my friends together in a big home (whether it be a huge house, take over an apartment complex… logistics for later) and live life in tight community.” –Josh Mello, 2007
That’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately – living with people and actively sharing your life with them. i don’t do that well – sharing. When i moved to Stellenbosch I had a choice between two flats, one sharing and one on my own but more expensive. I chose the more expensive. I tend to be very selfish with my space. I love the idea of living in community though, of having people there holding you accountable for your life, of having people to come home to – instead of my pc. I just don’t know if I’m cut out for it.
I first started thinking about this community thing in 2005 – after reading the book “Blue Like Jazz” (Donald Miller). I thought it sounded awesome and I think I would have done it then but my friends didn’t like the idea so much and to be honest I didn’t have the finances (I was living with the parents then). Then the idea came back again in the form of “The Irresistible Revolution”; this time I had the resources – living on my own, got a job to pay rent, etc – but then the friends were still not keen. Then Brett (youth pastor, vineyard christian fellowship, stellenbosch) said he was “starting one and people who are interested we’ll be meeting at…on …” and during the “…” I was thinking “I just signed a one year lease on my flat so that’s not for me”, and “yea, i don’t really know these people and they don’t know me, i wanted to do it with my friends”. Then he mentioned that he would be moving to Kayamandi and I thought “ok, now I know its definitely not for me, God wouldn’t move me back to Kasi (township)”.
I started volunteering with a group called Vision K this year – we teach life skills (e.g. self esteem, public speaking, leadership, etc) to a group of grade 10′s from Kayamandi High School. During a get-to-know-each-other session we came to learn that most of the girls in the group had “father issues”. I then went on to write this a few days later:
“my heart aches for the fatherless generation we are living in now. my heart aches for young boys who will grow up addicted to alcohol, womanizing, and beating up women because that’s what they know. my heart aches for girls who don’t realize their self worth and let men take advantage of them because they didn’t have a father around to show them how a woman should be loved. my heart aches because my relationship with my father is not what it should be. my heart aches because i fear that it might be too late for me.
i rejoice when i think that God wants to use my broken heart to heal others. i rejoice when i think that there is hope, and his name is Jesus. i rejoice at the fact that he can use my past hurts and my past experiences to minister to those who are where i was. I rejoice because its not about me, its all about his glory. i rejoice because he is God!”
Its always been my heart to minister to young girls in that situation. I just don’t know if Vision K is the right platform for that – well, not yet anyway. I don’t think the girls and I are in a place in our relationship where they would be comfortable to talk about deep stuff yet. So I’ve made myself available, and I pray that when they do need to talk they will feel comfortable enough to come to me.
One evening we were going to drop off some of the vision k peeps home and as we are driving through kasi I realize how much I miss it – you know, the little things like knowing who your neighbor is, or feeling so comfortable with your neighbor that you don’t have to call first to visit. ubuntu-ness . (side note: I think moving to the surburbs had a lot to do with my space-issues, and my lack of hospitality-ness, or maybe not – i don’t know). It then struck me that this is the place I was so against moving to, and yet this is the place where the very people I wanted to minister to were living. I’m not saying its God’s will that I move to Kayamandi, I’m not saying I’m going to move to Kayamandi – I’m just saying I’m thinking…maybe moving back to Thaba nchu?
watch this space.