Posts Tagged ‘writing’
[i wrote this the other day on one of my other blogs and i kinda liked it so i thought i'd share it here as well...it's all fiction by the way]
He said he loved her. She looked deep into his eyes, saw that it was true, kissed him, and turned around to walk away.
He grabbed her arm, “aren’t you gonna say it back?”
“Say what back?” she asked
“That you love me too” he replied
“I didn’t realise you saying you love me was a question”
“Then why are you waiting for a response?”
He sighed heavily. “Why do you always have to make everything so difficult?”
“I don’t know…I wish I knew…I gotta go”
She left the room.
He turned her face towards his: “I love you”. She looked deep into his eyes, saw that it was true, kissed him, and said “I know” then turned her attention back to the movie then whispered “I know” in a somewhat-defeated tone.
As they sat on the ground enjoying the indoor picnic, listening to the sound of the rain outside and the crackling fire in the fireplace, she suddenly looked up and into his eyes and blurted out “I love you”. He believed it, believed it more than anything he had ever believed in before. She looked like a deer caught in the headlights. She had said it, she hadn’t meant to…it just slipped out. He read the panic in her eyes, pulled her in close into a hug and let her head fall on his chest, and let his heartbeat do the talking for him.
That was the day she learned to fall.
Today will be my last post for 2011. The siblings are in town, and therefore I’m spending more time laughing my head off and less time reading and writing. Ok, that’s not the real reason, I’m just already in holiday mode…the brain is slowly shutting down…
2011 has been amazing in so many ways. Can’t say it’s been the best year yet, but it’s been great. I am thankful for all the awesome opportunities I’ve been given this year.
1. Bound – what an experience. That might be the only best acress award I ever get so gotta savour it.
2. Bravery…don’t think I wanna elaborate on there, but yes, worth it.
4. Moving back to Cape Town…although I miss Stellenbosch, I felt it was time for a change.
5. Writing – couple of short stories (which might never see the light of day), entering a music writing comp (didn’t win, but i entered…), and the new…uhm…writing exercise I mentioned last week
6. Friends – old, new, and langebaan adventures.
7. God; Love. Truth. Faithfulness.
So cheers to 2011. And here’s to 2012, and hoping the world doesn’t end, cos man, life is good! And the living is easy…
See you next year.
I’m busy writing something right now.
I don’t how long it’s gonna take to finish it – could be a week, month, year, never – or how long or what format it will be – short story, script, novel.
I woke up one morning and I had this story in my head, so I sat and wrote it out. Then I lost it. A few weeks later I thought about it again, and decided to re-write it. Then I found the original – the two copies were almost identical.
A couple of weeks after that I woke up and I had a rough outline of where the story was going, and a potential ending.
That was 2 weeks ago, haven’t worked on it since…keep waiting for that brilliant “wake up and just know” moment, but it’s not coming…which is why I’m not sure how long it’s gonna take. But everytime I work on it, I get really excited about it, so hopefully…
she could have sworn that smile was for her. she could have sworn that he had smiled at the sight of her walking through the doors. but she wasn’t going to let that happen again. she was older, she was wiser, she now recognised the way in which her mind and heart had always tricked her in the past.
she didn’t dare look at him. she looked up, down, stared out the window, down at the table in front of her…anywhere but at him…which proved quite difficult with him standing on the stage in front of her. but she was determined. if she looked at him and he was looking at her, she would do something stupid…like smile…and give away her feelings…so she focused on not looking at him.
“why did i agreed to come to this gig with kelly in the first place?” she wondered. “this is definitely not condusive to getting over him.”
as the last notes of the last song rang out she knew it was time to get going.
“oh come on, there’s one more band…please let’s stay” kelly begged
she was in the middle of going through all the excuses why they couldn’t stay when she heard that voice…
the voice that had the power to somehow make her heart stop and beat faster simultaneously
the voice she had fallen in love with over 5 years ago
the voice she thought she’d wake up next to for the rest of her life…at least until last month when he told her that it wasn’t working for him anymore.
she turned around to see the eyes that went with that voice looking at her, and in that moment she knew she would forever be in love with that smile…
he said he loved me. i believed him. i believed every word that came out of his mouth. and now i just wonder how much of it he meant. it couldn’t have all been lies could it?
i still remember the very first day we met…he was charming, wonderful, sweet, told me i was beautiful. he swept me right off my feet. i suppose i should have known better. i should have listened to my friend and family. but i just couldn’t see past that smile. he really did have a beautiful smile.
even afterwards….even after all the pain, and abuse, broken promises…i still believed him. everytime he told me i was the only one – that he didn’t care about the others…i did this to myself. i let this happen. i fooled myself into believing i was better, that i deserved better…but…i don’t. i’m always gonna be that little girl, stuck in some small town, going nowhere. i really should have stayed…life was simpler back then.
all i know is, i can’t stay here anymore. i can’t stay in this place. they just don’t understand.
maybe i should go back…
maybe he really does love me…
This is just an exercise in/attempt at creative writing. It will make a lot more sense if you come to the event in the attached pic.
it is absolutely awesome getting recognised for doing a good job at something. you know when you put in the extra time and effort at work and you are rewarded with a raise or you are selected employee of the month or even just getting a special mention in the staff meeting – it gives you a feeling of achievement…like, it makes it kind of worthwhile.
but i’ve discovered an even better feeling – getting recognised for doing something you love. you know when you do something, not to impress anyone or because you want recognition or anything other the fact that you absolutely love it – that in itself is it’s own reward. like when you write a blog you are sure no one reads – a blog you really just write for yourself – it just kinda makes you happy. so when someone else does read it and says, “hey thanks for posting that” it’s like the cherry on the top.
the other day i got a shout out from my friend on twitter for my blogs. i write my blogs because i love writing. i love putting my thoughts out there into this crazy connection called the internet – not so that people can read them and think that i’m a great writer or anything like that…just cos i need to get them out of my head so that i don’t dwell on them too much – they tend to drive me crazy if i just dwell on them.
but once in a while someone will read what i wrote and connect with it or learn something from something it, and although that was not the intention of the writing – or at least not the primary intention – it feels kinda good to know i’m not alone. it feels kinda good when God uses me to speak to someone else. it feels kinda good when someone says “hey, i read something you wrote and thought it was good”.
i think it’s because when you do something for the love of doing it, that love comes through in that thing you do…and so other people respond to that love…
so big up to those people who do what they love…and for the rest, find what you love…do what you love and love what you do!
I’ve been writing a lot lately, which is really good. Not blogging-writing but like songs, poetry, etc…I don’t put any of that stuff on here cos it’s quite personal and not good enough to be read by the general public. But I enjoy it so… I was telling my friend Isa the other day how I’ve been writing songs in my dreams lately…really cool…so she suggested that I keep paper and a pen by my bed so that I could write them down in the morning while they are still fresh in my mind…so I did…but I haven’t dreamed up new songs since then…oh well
I haven’t done much of that lately…I need to get back into it. And I dont’ know why I haven’t been reading…i’m just lazy to open a book.
faith and hope
We’ve been talking about faith and hope the last few weeks in youth (i’m one of the youth leaders in my church which is super cool…but will get into that in a few minutes). Anyway, last week we were talking about hope and how we can place our hopes and dreams in God’s hands because he really does care. We can fully have faith in him because of his unable-to-lie-ness.
I was reading Amos last night and realised that although most of the book is about how God is going to destroy Israel and surrounds, He ends it on this beautiful note of hope – to restore Israel…which just reminded me that He is our hope. You place your hope in anything else and it’s anyone’s guess what will happen…you place your hope in him and in his word and you can’t go wrong
he really does care about us and he really does want the best for us…
So as i’ve said before, I always wanted to work with youth, especially young, fatherless females and help them discover their worth and to help them learn to love themselves. I am working with youth at the moment, but not in the way I thought I would.
Firstly there’s vision k, which i have loved working with since the beginning of this year and still look forward to the meetings with anticipation every tuesday. That’s what gets me through my work every tuesday, knowing that at the end of the day vision k awaits. And I suppose the chicks from vision k are the people i wanted to work with as most of them are living the whole fatherless-generation situation.
I recently became part of the team that leads youth at my church…we only have 2 chicks though, and they both seem like they come from proper families where they know who their father is and have a relationship with their father and all’s well so not what I was going for but God has a way of changing our plans to be more in-line with his and to make them…better…so I have faith that he knows what he’s doing and I’m just going to follow as he leads
Must say though, truly enjoying both of these youth groups…the youth, the leaders, the work God’s doing…awesomeness!
Just came across this band called Gravity Wins Again, and if you haven’t already, I’d recommend you check them out. They are really good and I’m sure they are going to take South Africa by storm
And I’m also loving the song Prodigal by One Republic…has me written all over it.
And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love, but the greatest of these is love
In closing, I serve a really big God
[Feeling too small for God by Jon Acuff - Stuff Christians Like]
The world is pretty big. There are a lot of countries, with millions and millions of square miles of people and land and ocean. The universe is even bigger than that. I’ve never been but from the photos I’ve seen it’s massive. Pathways of stars, belts of black holes and galaxies and planets. It’s just endless, and somewhere up there, God knows your boyfriend broke up with you.
Maybe He doesn’t. I mean, maybe He’s up there and He’s working on really big stuff. He’s healing famines and trying to bring peace to war torn lands. The greatness of His issues makes your little issues look ordinary and simple and maybe even boring.
But every now and then I come across a verse that shakes my deep belief that I am beneath God’s radar. One that I love is Psalm 56:8. Here, in what hopefully makes me look pretty smart, is the King James Version:
“Thou tellest my wanderings: put thou my tears into thy bottle: are they not in thy book?”
But maybe you’re not old school, so here’s what the New Living Translation says:
“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.”
I think that’s beautiful. Can you imagine that? Can you picture God doing that? Taking His giant hands and tenderly picking up every single one of your tears? Knowing why they came, understanding what they mean, placing them in His bottle, so that He can comfort you.
That’s how God spends his days.
That’s how small this big universe is.